Major life changes, even the good ones, can be scary. The unknown always is. We get into a routine and fall into our comfort zones. Many of us like to remain there; however, transition is an inevitable part of life no matter what steps you take to keep it to a minimum. Therefore, it makes sense to address this inevitability and share with you what I’ve learned when it comes to facing new things
Change Allows for Growth
Despite the exhaustion it can cause, change almost always causes us to grow in some way. You gain new coping mechanisms, learn about personal characteristics you never knew you had and discover life lessons that will serve you well in the future.
Growing up I moved every few years, sometimes we moved across town and sometimes across the country. We moved for my parents schooling and job, divorce and simply for the thrill of it. By the time I graduated from high school I had live in seven states and physically moved 13 times. This carried obvious challenges growing up, making friends, adjusting to a new school etc. However, my ability to cope is off the charts and change was ingrained in me early. I believe it helped me easily transition to Canada in my mid-twenties and build this very business I am writing for. Change is the catalyst for forward movement!
I know the circumstances around growth can sometimes be difficult, and I don’t mean to make light of trying circumstances. Just know that it is possible to learn something and to change for the better during the hard times.
It Will Get Better
Hard times always seem their worst in the moment, while you’re living them. It can seem impossible to consider a future when the problem will be gone.
What might help is to think about a time when you overcame difficulties and faced change head on. Recall the feelings you had at the time, how you managed them during the rough moments and how you felt once the change began to fade into routine. That’s the thing. A life transition or disruption is only new for a time, and then it becomes a part of your everyday reality. You adapt and accommodate to fit this new thing into your life. You learn different activities, and the new eventually becomes old hat.
Learning the ropes at a new job is something that comes to mind. We’ve all dealt with the unfamiliar policies, activities and routines of a new gig. Eventually, we learn them, and they are familiar. It gets better.
How to Cope
In the meantime, there are ways to cope. The way you look at and think about your situation has a huge impact on how you feel about it. Try to think of this time of transition as something exciting or a chance to grow. Sometimes looking at it as a challenge to overcome can make it seem more like a game or puzzle. Also, be gentle with yourself. You don’t have to learn everything all at once.
Adapting to change takes time. Allow yourself to feel your emotions, and don’t berate yourself for them. It’s okay to feel frustrated, scared, sad, lonely or even angry. Finally, be sure to reach out for help if you need it. You don’t have to be a super hero. Allow friends or loved ones to step in and take on some of your burden. Even having a listening ear at your disposal can alleviate lots of stress. If professional help is in order, do try to attain that. You’ll feel so much better when you do.
Change is definitely scary, but it’s not stronger than you. Getting through transitional times can actually transform you, and things almost always do get better.